1. Your feet stick to the kitchen floor.....and you're too tired to care.

2. You can't find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket.

3. You spend an entire week wearing sweats.

4. Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you.

5. Popsicles become a food staple.

6. Your favorite television show is a cartoon.

7. Peanut butter and jelly is eaten for at least one meal a day.

8. Your baby's pacifier falls on the floor and you give it back to her, after you suck the dirt off of it because your too busy to wash it off.

9. Your kids make jokes about farting, burping, pooping, etc.. and you think it's funny.

10. You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the tele-marketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU!

11. Spit is your number one cleaning agent.

12. In your bathroom there is toothpaste on the light fixtures, water all over the floorand a dog is drinking out of the toilet.

13. The closest you get to gourmet cooking is making rice krispies bars.

14. You're up each night until 10 PM vacuuming, dusting, wiping, washing, drying, loading, unloading, shopping, cooking, driving, flushing, ironing, sweeping, picking up, changing sheets, changing diapers, bathing, helping with homework, paying bills, budgeting, clipping coupons, folding clothes, putting to bed, dragging out of bed, brushing, chasing, buckling, feeding (them, not you), PLUS swinging, playing base-ball, bike riding, pushing trucks, cuddling dolls, rollerblading, basketball, football, catch, bubbles, sprinklers, slides, nature walks, coloring, crafts, jumping rope, PLUS raking, trimming, planting, edging, mowing, gardening, painting, and walking the dog. You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, and yet...you still managed to gain 10 pounds.

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